Ayahuasca works for my memory in probably opposite way than cannabis. Years into that relationship I am still amazed when new pathways open, new vistas, when mouldy, dusty corners I never even expected to visit start to shine with eerie clarity, and my attention, without any specific will, intention or logical train of thought leading me there, goes to random, very specific, very detailed moments of my life, places, people. I am not talking here just about significant events, like favourite of psychotherapy, trauma, or turning points, things that gave my life meaning. At least not in rational sense, because after all, maybe meaning is in those insignificant details, hair of the dog, light in branches, one specific piss taken in dark alley of Delhi slums. It is literally that clear, like a zoom into arm tattoo of someone I have been chatting with 10 years ago. It all has dream quality about the way my mind arrives at certain sight, “in-sight” to be precise, but it is no illusion at all, very factual, very true. It is even often verifiable, if I reach into deep contents of my photo archive, at some periods built day after a day of documenting of what I saw and experience, now, if humidity does not destroy it, waiting there, with precise EXIF of date and hour, ready to be accessed thanks to modern technology just like it is ready to access in my brain’s hard drive thanks to the ancient technology of the vine.

So here go some snapshots of my memory.

In recent decades we have travelled very fast on road of changing relationships with psychedelics – from therapists saying “drugs are bad, mmkay, what you need is our therapy” to users saying “ayahuasca gave me what 10 years of therapy couldn’t deliver” to finally therapists saying “mmkay, some drugs are good, but you NEED our therapy in the package”.

What about all finally acknowledging validity of journey itself, and relativity of importance of various stations – or destinations for that matter. What is needed for that is great courage for many involved – for some travelers to admit they are not “strong” enough to continue on their own, but for some therapists as well to confront their hidden fear of being left on their own, of not being needed, and hence not only jumping on the wagon, but forcing the view that all must jump on it the way they see it best.

Before my journey brought me to the Amazon, I have followed Sufi ways – literally and metaphorically, as each of their many branches is called precisely that – tariqa, “a path”. There are many of them, and far from being perfectly tolerant, those who trod on chosen one often look down upon others, see them as controversial, but despite the dialectic game, it seems like they – and many of us, remain aware of the underlying truth, that they are “only” that, a path, and most of all, rather then preach your truth, it is much more important to embody it.

“The thing we tell of can never be found by seeking, yet only seekers find it.”
Bayazid Bastami (804 – 874)

Work with ayahuasca is a process in which these words of famous Sufi mystic resonate eeringly well. No matter how profound the mystery revealed, how great the understanding, if we cling to it, we are inevitably punished with proportional diminishment of its power, it is as fleeting an effect as we want to make it permanent. Actually, this is not a punishment, this is a simple rule of nature.

Big bow to the gifts of coronavirus time, when more and more is taken away, so that we can open our eyes to see that rule and learn to be flexible.

Big bow to fellow seekers, for not loosing hope, holding each other up in times of doubt.

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“To, o czym mówimy nie da się znaleźć poprzez szukanie, a jednak tylko poszukujący to znajdują”

Bayazid Bastami (804 – 874)

Praca z ayahuaską to proces w którym te słowa sufickiego mistyka rezonują niepokojąco prawdziwie. Nieważne jak głęboka tajemnica jest w nim ujawniana, jak wielkie zrozumienie, jeżeli się jego kurczowo uczepiamy, nieuchronnie spotka nas proporcjonalne do tego czepiania umniejszenie mocy tego katharsis / zrozumienia, są one dokładnie tak ulotne, jak bardzo chcemy by były trwałe. To prosty mechanizm, im szybciej go zaakceptujemy, tym będzie łatwiej.

Wielki ukłon i szacunek dla podarunków czasu zarazy, kiedy coraz więcej jest nam odbierane, abyśmy w końcu mogli otworzyć oczy i nauczyć się być elastycznymi.

Wielki ukłon dla współposzukiwaczy, za nie tracenie nadziei i podnoszenie drugiego w czasach wątpliwości.

And if along the way you feel frustrated, you feel like it is one step forward, two steps backward, the remember from the same mystic and be grateful and patient :

When Bayazid died, he was over seventy years old. Before he died, someone asked him his age. He said: I am four years old. For seventy years I was veiled. I got rid of my veils only four years ago.

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A jeżeli na tej ścieżce czujecie się sfrustrowani, że to jest ciągle jeden krok do przodu i dwa do tyłu, pamiętajcie inną historię tegoż mistyka i bądźcie wdzięczni i cierpliwi :

Kiedy Bayazid umarł, miał ponad 70 lat. Zanim to się stało, ktoś zapytał go o wiek. Odrzekł : Mam cztery lata. Przez 70 lat nosiłem zasłony, spadły dopiero cztery lata temu.

There is this recurring voice of armchair experts about ayahuasca tourism being cultural appropriation. We listen to it mostly when we make mistake of distracting ourselves from 7 days a week hard work, in a place where we live as the locals, off grid, drawing water from the well, consuming basic necessities available in local market, and that is year after year, serving all kind of intense energies people bring with them for treatment. We learn from the indigenous elders, provide them with constant job paid way above local standards. You can say we can simply stop making that stupid mistake and engaging with those voices, regardless if they come from anthropologist pushing his agenda or just “I know it all” internauts. And yes, that is the best answer. However polemic devil inside just needs to add his pinch of salt : when authors of these voices succeed with their negativity, and combined forces of decline of global tourism, legalization globally, need for easier life ( and actually, contrary to the myth about fortunes in ayahuasca tourism, need for stable economic situation ) will drive this adventure in Amazon to the end, then you will see true appropriation. Instead of artisanal heart driven enterprises, you will see proper business, psychedelic franchise clinics, retreats twice as expensive popping up in Europe or USA, done without any need for indigenous guides, you will see ayahuasca turned into another commodity – raw resource just like cacao or coffee, bought from lowest bidder, or even worse – just like in the story of collapse of rubber – planted where labour costs and effectiveness of exploitation of global capitalism is at its best, probably in South East Asia. And so your precious Amazon will be free from evil exploitation of ayahuasca business, free for cattle ranchers and oil extractors, to provide fuel for your comfortable, daily lifestyle in the global centre, away from this annoying poverty, as some would be yoga student deciding against learning in India put it.

The photo above is ironic illustration for this story. It is my own image, which in times while I was still hoping to be able to continue making honest living from photography I uploaded to Alamy, and now, that I sacrificed to the Amazon not only my time but also some hard drives devoured by humidity, this corporate vendor, that pays pennies and charges giant percentage of commission on the sales is the only place I can access the image, but if I want it watermark free, I would have to buy it myself.

[ POLSKIE TŁUMACZENIE PONIŻEJ ]

Can ayahusca help reduce the symptoms of grief? According to a study recently published in the journal Psychopharmacology, ayahuasca – also known as the “vine of the soul” within the Peruvian indigenous Shipibo healing system – can help people who are grieving the loss of a loved one, significantly reducing symptoms, such as anxiety and depression. Benefits lasted for up to a year following the retreat.

International Center for Ethnobotanical Education, Research and Service (ICEERS), in collaboration with the Beckley Foundation, conducted a study into ayahuasca’s potential for people grieving the death of a loved one. The study, entitled “Therapeutic potential of ayahuasca in grief: a prospective, observational study” and published on January 14, opens up a new avenue for research into effective therapeutic approaches for prolonged grief.

“We found that ayahuasca eases the acceptance of a loved one’s death,” said Dr. Debora Gonzalez, the study’s principal investigator.

Participants in the study attended a retreat at the Temple of the Way of Light, a center located near Iquitos, Peru, in the heart of the Amazon rainforest, where they participated in a series of traditional medicine ceremonies lead by indigenous Shipibo healers. Ninety-two percent of patients experienced relief from symptoms of grief, noting benefits on a spiritual level and in social relationships, as well as on their physical and psychological health. It was found that the experiences expand on the materialistic way we approach life and death in the Global North.

Grief is a natural process that occurs in human beings when a family member or close friend dies. However, when it is prolonged it can become pathological. In fact, the WHO recently included Prolonged Grief Disorder as a new diagnosis in the latest version of the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11). Prolonged grief affects 9.8% of people who have lost a loved one. The family, social and occupational impact of this diagnosis is comparable to that of depression or post-traumatic stress. Medications alone are not effective in reducing it, and psychotherapy does not achieve the effectiveness it has shown in treating other clinical problems. Since the experience of grief is universal, it is urgent to find new therapeutic paradigms to address our relationship with death.

A previous study, ( https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0030222817710879 ) published in Omega – Journal of Death and Dying, also conducted by ICEERS, found that one third of mourners who had participated in an ayahuasca ceremony reported experiences of an encounter with the “presence,” “soul,” or “essence” of their loved one.

“We found that having an experience of an encounter with a loved one who has passed away and being able to resolve the doubts and issues that were left pending and to establish a continuing bond, has a therapeutic impact on the grievers that is difficult to achieve with the techniques currently used in conventional psychotherapy. This type of experience tends to transform their view of life and death,” adds Dr. González.

SOURCE :  https://www.iceers.org/ayahuasca-opens-up-new-possibilities-for-grief-therapy

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[ POLISH ]

Czy ayahuaska może pomóc zmniejszyć symptomy żałoby? Według ostatnio opublikowanego w Psychopharmacology badania ( https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s00213-019-05446-2 ), ayahuaska, znana także jako “pnącze duszy” w systemie medycznym rdzennego peruwiańskiego plemienia Shipibo, może pomóc osobom opłakującym bliską osobę w znacznym zmniejszeniu symptomów takich jak nerwica i depresja. Pozytywne efekty mogą utrzymywać się nawet do roku po przyjęciu substancji.

International Center for Ethnobotanical Education, Research and Service (ICEERS) we współpracy z Beckley Foundation przeprowadziło badanie nad potencjałem ayahuaski dla osób opłakujących bliską osobę. Studium to, zatytułowane “Terapeutyczny potencjał ayahuaski w żałobie : badanie obserwowanych efektów” i opublikowane 14 stycznia 2020, otwiera nowe ścieżki dla badań nad skutecznymi terapeutycznymi podejściami do przedłużającej się żałoby.

“Odkryliśmy, że ayahuaska ułatwia proces godzenia się ze śmiercią kochanej osoby”, mówi dr Debora Gonzalez, główna prowadząca procesu badawczego.

Uczestniczący w badaniu brali udział w odosobnieniu z ayahuaską w Temple of the New Way of Light, centrum położonego w pobliżu Iquitos, w Peru, w sercu peruwiańskiej Amazonii, gdzie uczestniczyli w serii ceremonii tradycyjnej medycyny, prowadzonych przez rdzennych uzdrowicieli Shipibo. 92 procent pacjentów doświadczyło ulgi w objawach żałoby i smutku, rejestrując pozytywne efekty w sferze duchowej i w relacjach społecznych, jak również w stanie swego zdrowia fizycznego i psychologicznego. Okazało się, że ich doświadczenia poszerzają dominującą na globalnej Północy materialistyczną perspektywę z jaką podchodzi się do życia i śmierci.

Żałoba jest naturalnym procesem, jaki zachodzi w człowieku, kiedy członek rodziny lub bliski przyjaciel umiera. Jego nadmierne przeciąganie w czasie może jednak stać się patologiczne. W istocie, WHO ostatnio włączyło “zaburzenie przedłużonej żałoby” jako nową diagnozę do ostatniej wersji Międzynarodowej Klasyfikacji Chorób ( (ICD-11). Przedłużona żałoba dotyka 9,8% ludzi, którzy stracili kogoś bliskiego. Rodzinne, społeczne i zawodowe konsekwencje takiej diagnozy są porównywalne do tych w przypadku depresji czy zespołu traumy pourazowej. Same leki nie są wystarczająco skuteczne w zmniejszeniu tych symptomów a psychoterapia nie wykazuje takiej efektywności jak w terapii innych problemów klinicznych. Ponieważ żałoba jest doświadczeniem uniwersalnym, odnalezienie nowych terapeutycznych paradygmatów dla naszej relacji ze śmiercią staje się pilnym zagadnieniem.

Poprzednie badanie ( https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0030222817710879 ) opublikowane w Omega – Journal of Death and Dying, również prowadzone przez ICEERS, pokazało że jedna trzecia żałobników, jacy wzięli udział w ceremonii ayahuaski, przytaczało przykłady kontaktu z “obecnością”, “duszą” lub też “esencją” ukochanej osoby.

“Odkryliśmy, iż doświadczenie spotkania z opłakiwaną osobą i możliwość rozwiania wątpliwości czy rozwiązania niedokończonych spraw i wzmocnienia trwałej więzi, ma terapeutyczny wpływ na żałobników jaki trudno osiągnąć technikami obecnie dostępnymi dla konwencjonalnej psychoterapii. Tego typu doświadczenie zwykle transformuje pogląd na życie i śmierć, dodaje dr Gonzalez.

Źródło : https://www.iceers.org/ayahuasca-opens-up-new-possibilities-for-grief-therapy